Every once in a while, Ivar would retreat to a secret spot, where he would set up his little nail salon. Not to treat anyone else, but to enjoy a particular hue of red.
The untold secret:
Ivar, a 19-year-old young man, has a habit that he has kept hidden from everyone. He carries with him a small bottle of nail polish, a secret that he guards carefully. This nail polish is not just any ordinary bottle, it holds a special significance for him. Every once in a while, Ivar would retreat to a secluded spot, where he would set up his little nail salon. He would carefully place the bottle, a couple of paper towels, and a nail polish remover in front of him, and then, with great care and attention, he would paint the nails on his right hand with the crimson red polish that only came in form of a nail polish.
Ivar would take as much time as he could for this ritual, savoring the sensation of the way the color would change and deepen as it dried. He would sit there, lost in his own thoughts, letting the world around him fade away as he absorbed this particular hue of red. And when he was finished, he would carefully remove the polish, leaving no trace behind, and return to his everyday life.
Ivar was a curious and introspective child, often lost in his deep thoughts. He grew up in a middle-class family, with loving parents and a younger sister. His family was pretty average, they would have dinner together every night and spend their weekends playing board games, something Ivar enjoyed doing but never admitted to.
It was in the 5th grade when Ivar first encountered the phenomenon that would change his life forever. His teacher, Mrs. Bauer, had a habit of painting her nails during class while the students were writing their tests. Ivar couldn't help but be drawn to the colorful bottles of nail polish on her desk, and as the days went by, he found himself increasingly captivated by the way the color seemed to shimmer and dance in the light.
One day, as he stared at the bottle of crimson red nail polish, he felt an overwhelming rush of emotions wash over him. He couldn't explain it, but he felt like he was falling in love with his teacher. He was confused and ashamed, not sure what was happening to him. He couldn't understand why he was feeling this way, and he didn't know how to deal with it. He didn't want to tell anyone about it, not even his close friend. He thought it was a crush and he didn't even want to consider the consequences of that.
Time went by and Ivar tried to put the strange feelings he had experienced in the 5th grade behind him. But he couldn't shake the sense that there was something important he was missing. And then, one day, while waiting for his mom at a makeup store in town, he found himself sitting on a leather sofa next to a display of nail polishes. As he looked at the different colors, he felt the same rush of emotions he had felt years before. This time, however, he was able to identify that it was the color itself that was causing these feelings. He picked up the bottle and turned it around in his hands, studying the special hue and the way it shimmered in the light. He felt a sense of familiarity and comfort, but also a hint of confusion and uncertainty. He felt like he was on the cusp of understanding something important about himself.
Ivar returned to the makeup store on a different day, filled with a sense of determination. He knew that this particular nail polish was the key to understanding the strange, but yet almost euphoric emotions he had experienced as a child. He walked straight to the display of nail polishes and picked up the bottle that he could spot from far away. He instantly felt that sense of familiarity and comfort again. Ivar was now more curious than ever to find out how this color was connected to this feelings.
When Ivar first discovered his intense emotional reaction to the crimson red nail polish, he was unsure of what to make of it. He initially assumed that he might have a fetish for nail polishes of that particular kind. As he began experimenting with the color, he noticed that the emotions he felt were particularly strong when the hue changed from a lighter to a darker red as it dried. The sensation was so captivating and beautiful that Ivar didn't want to give it up, even if it might have been perceived as strange by others. As a result, he started to paint his nails in secret, enjoying those moments of solitude and indulging in the beauty of the color. He found that the process of applying and removing the polish was soothing, and it helped him to cope with the daily stressors of life.
Today, Ivar has come to understand that his emotional reaction to the red nail polish is connected to his condition of synesthesia. He has come to realize that the feelings he experiences when viewing this particular hue of red are not an unexplained fetish or, god forbid, a subconscious crush for his teacher Mrs. Bauer, but rather a unique response to the color. He now understands that the sensation of beauty and peace he feels while indulging in his secret habit of painting his nails with crimson red nail polish is a result of the way his brain processes sensory information. He has come to appreciate and accept his synesthesia as a unique aspect of himself and continues to use this color as a way to cope with his emotions.